Happy *1st* birthday Hudson!!!

The birthday boy is fast asleep listening to his personalized lullabies (thanks Grams and Pap!). And I just finished crying my eyes out as I rocked him to sleep. When did he get so big?? I sat with him, looking at my little angel fast asleep, and tried with all of my might to remember every detail about his precious face before I blink and he's 2. I want to memorize every hair on his head (there aren't many!), every eyelash on each eyelid, every movement he makes as he smiles while he's asleep.


It's hard to think back one year and remember Hudson as a newborn. Sure, I have pictures and videos, but my arms can't recall what it's like to cuddle a 7 lb baby, my hands forget the motions of swaddling a little burrito, and my body forgets the struggles to begin breastfeeding. While each day still brings new adventures, the uncertainty of being a first time parent has now been replaced with a new level of confidence. Instead of questioning each decision, such as is he hungry, is he tired, why won't he sleep (well, we still ask that one!), we've found our groove. We've learned to trust our instincts, to take Hudson's cues, and to do what works for the three of us. It amazes me how naturally parenthood comes. Before Hudson arrived, I was worried that I wouldn't "get it" and just "know" how to be a mother. Now, I can't imagine myself as anything but a mother. As if my special time tonight with Hudson wasn't enough stress on my tear ducts, I also saw a message from my dear friend Jess. She told me how proud she was of me and called me a "wonderful mommy". That brought tears to my eyes. Being a mother is my greatest of all my life's accomplishments.


In an attempt to remember my monkey when he was my little peanut, I decided to make this post a "year in review".


We've survived labor and delivery, breastfeeding, sleep deprivation, and jaundice. We've celebrated 12 "birthdays", a first tooth, a first "word" (da-da), and a first step. We've been pooped on, peed on, and puked on. We've made tons of new friends, attended playgroups, enjoyed "Mother Goose on the Loose". We've introduced cereal, tried lots of fruits and vegetables, and found our favorites in Baby Mum Mums and Spaghetti with Cheese baby food. We've played, we've read books, we've swam, we've "scored!". We've bought toys and learned that only ones with wheels will work. We've met Rachel, Alex, and Leah and learned how to sign. We've welcomed Hudson into Steeler Nation. We've questioned some decisions, we've had faith in others. We've taken advice and we've learned when we need to be our own experts. We've endured vaccines, a cat bite, and bumps on the head. We've reveled in the excitement of a first Christmas spent with loved ones and ached in the moments that we couldn't share with our families. We've smiled, we've giggled, we've cried, we've grown. We've become a family.

Happy birthday Monkey Man!